Dark Days

The one thing in life that is absolute and certain is the loss of life. We are not immortal.  Most of us have made our peace in our own way with that fact. The thing that we are never prepared for is the loss of someone we love.  As much of  "be prepared" person as I am, I know that there is no preparing for the pain and grief of loss. The single thing that we humans can do is to prepare to survive such a loss. 

I'm in the midst of losing my oldest and dearest friend. Not only has she been in my life since I was just a girl but her spouse and family have been like family to myself, my spouse and children.  The memories of things shared would fill up a boat.  Indeed, that boatload of memories is the best comfort that I have. And it's typical that life has said to her, "You didn't really think I was going to be fair, did you?" with a vicious laugh.  It is taking her through a cruel illness. The pain that her family has and is enduring only doubles my family's sadness. So, in all this deep sadness and grief, there is the knowing that we can never be prepared, get ourselves ready for the losses.

I personally am an optimist. One of the things that is often said about my post apocalyptic novels is that there is hope. I honestly see no point in NOT having hope.  Just as all the clichés say, the sun will come up in the morning,  life will continue around us (we hope).  If you open your eyes and you are still here on this earth, no matter how miserable or horrible yesterday was, you are here and will have to move through today. 

I believe that a person should prepare in any way available to survive. I believe you should buy that extra box of mac and cheese and stick it in the closet, not live in fear but be aware of the results of a catastrophe in your world.  In our everyday life, I believe we should remember to tell those we care about that we love them and I believe we should store up good memories as if they are gold and toss away the bad ones. After we have cried our eyes out, after we have allowed the pain to squeeze our hearts and twist our stomachs, we have to find the courage to appreciate the time that we were given, the memories that we can cherish of someone we love. 

It is a privilege to be living on this earth and your life is what you make of it. It is of no benefit and in truth if you drown in the floods of sorrow, you will be no more than a ripple on the water. The secret is to survive and to honor the person you loved by holding them in your heart and taking them with you as you continue the walk through life. 

Unable are the loved to die. For love is immortality.---Emily Dickinson