Performance Issues

Don't get excited...this is not a "Fifty Shades of Grey" story. It is about job performance. The hubby and I, in general have a pretty good partnership.  He does many jobs that I can't and don't want to do and I do many that he could but won't do. I have to be fair, it's not that he makes no effort at all.  One of the jobs that he has accepted is to help a bit with the evening meal. His duties are to get out the placemats, napkins, plates and silverware and to fill the tea glasses.

On his good days, he manages pretty well.  As long as the tea is made--that would involve the complicated process of unwrapping two cold brew tea bags and putting them in a jug of cold water. No more than six questions of
"How're you doing?...can I put the ice in?...do I need to wait?...is it time? We usually have something to eat with and iced tea by mealtime.

Lately, he had developed this habit of disappearing to his shop about 30-45 minutes prior to dinner. Other than him growing weary of my stimulating cocktail hour conversation, I've not the slightest idea of what the "old guy" is doing out there.  Is there a girlfriend in the trunk of his beloved vintage Mustang? Is he testing his home brewed moonshine?  Is he practicing his clog moves to his twangy bluegrass tunes? It's anybody's guess. 

However, at about that time, I kick into high gear. It's time to prepare dinner and I get into my been there and done that a million times, multi-tasking mode.  I'm in a whirl of busy-busy and you're not to mess with me.  So, last evening, the man saunters inside about ten minutes before the magic time of dinner is ready.  He stands in his genius disguise (or perhaps his drunken stupor) and stares at his jobs that are already done. 

I give him a minute or two to ponder. The creaking wheels turning in his head echo in the kitchen.

I say, "I'm sorry to tell you, but I'm going to have to let you go."

"What-t-t??" he blinks at me.

"You're fired.  You suck at this job."

Now, when I told my good friend of this incident, she said, "Don't be hasty, maybe you should try two weeks suspension without pay."

Our youngest daughter, always business proper, asked me some pertinent questions.  Was he properly trained?  Does he understand the importance of his job to mealtime? Is he frustrated, does he act safely, does he have a good attitude? Does he know that I care about him as a person?

Well, years of training  proved to be fruitless. I would say he is untrainable. He doesn't seem to be particularly frustrated or worried about the importance of his work.  Safe? The man would run in front of a semi-truck to save a kitten. The only attitude he has is "If you don't like it, you can kiss my a--".

In spite of all these considerations, I'm thinking of keeping him on.  He is useful and good at many things and I do care about him as a person---that is, when he's not being the south end of  horse.