Going With The Flow

The hubby and I have always agreed and laughed about the fact that we are just middle of the road folks.  We don't have wild and amazing adventures but we don't sit in our chair and never venture out. We take very calculated risks, plan and research our life changes.  We aren't the smartest or the richest or the most beautiful but we aren't the dumbest, poorest or ugly.  You know, just somewhere in the middle of life's extremes, like the large majority of humans.

I would say that there are more reasonable waters to navigate, somewhere in between struggling upstream and laying on your back and floating downstream. 

Sometimes choices and sometimes change that is out of our control make very big diversions in the river of life.  Selling our house in our hometown, keeping our summer cabin 800 miles away and choosing to live in a travel trailer when we are home brought many changes.  One decision nearly always brings many, many more.  When a choice that you make doesn't exactly bring the perfect results that you were after or when an unexpected  event knocks you off your feet, that's when "going with the flow" is a good response. You can't panic, turn and fight wildly upstream against natural currents.  Maybe just kick your feet a bit and get your bearings, make a new plan as to where you're headed. 

Going with the flow doesn't mean that you have no control. We always have choices, some control of our direction. Even with bad things such as health issues, personal losses or disasters, we have control over how we are going to respond and deal with the situation.   Anyone who has ever had to deal with a painful personal loss will tell you that the most surprising and amazing thing is when the morning comes, the new day dawns and life, the world goes on....they felt certain that the world had stopped with their pain. 

The world does not stop, life rushes on.  Whether you're flailing against the flow or rolling along with it, you will not be allowed to stay in one place, you're going to move. It seems to me that if you do anchor yourself in one place, you will certainly eventually drown in boredom and a river of what ifs.  I choose to seek out that place of peace in between, keep myself off the rocks and away from the rapids.  Upstream is behind me, already washed away and I want to see what's around the bend. I just prefer to move ahead at my own speed.  If I need to sit on the shore for a while and think about it, I will but I know that sooner or later, I'll dive back in and ride the waves.

Excerpt from New Booklet

INTRODUCTION

Tales and advice are everywhere these days about downsizing your life. Television and the media, magazines can certainly make the idea of simplifying appear intriguing and tempting. Stories and images of travel trailers and motor homes, tiny houses, condos, town homes and their smiling residents---or are they gritting their teeth?---are everywhere. These images make the prospect of paring down look like a dream. In a country that is bloated with stuff and things and responsibilities, who wouldn't be fascinated with the possibility, the alternative lifestyle of less.

The big question is, Is it right for you? Could you, maybe you and a partner or family benefit from shrinking your life, would it be do-able, why would you want to? People of all ages and situations are considering this lifestyle change. It may be living smaller but it's definitely not a small decision to make. The hubby and I are approximately 99% complete in our downsizing adventure. We haven't regretted our decision, though it is certainly not for everyone. I would like to share our experience, the lessons learned, present some pros and cons and hopefully help some of you to make a good choice in your life.

I won't sugar coat it, this has been a monstrous undertaking. If you check the life calender for the two of us, we're in the late Fall of our life. We've had plenty of years to accumulate. This decision brought six long months of hard choices and lots of hard work. Making an agreeable plan, de-cluttering, giving up stuff and following through with the plan has strained our backs and our nerves. We are just now, finally able to look at each other in wonder and say “What have we done? Are we crazy or clever as foxes?”

I'll let you make that determination. Happy reading and good luck with all your adventures, big and small.

The March of The New American Nazis

The attack on our liberties continues and the fascists of our country grow bolder.  There are the word Nazis, the food Nazis, the smoking Nazis...the growing armies of frack-ing Nazis!   Heil-ya'll.  Just pick your cause and fall in step with those that would dictate or have the government regulate what we do, how we run our business, what we think and what we say. 

It all goes against the very principles of freedom.  In a free society, it is guaranteed that all creeds, colors and cultures will live together and have the right to pursue their beliefs and happiness.  In such an idealistic democratic melting pot of mixed humanity, individuals will be offended, will be in deep disagreement with other citizens.  The whole point is supposed to be that free people have the right to protest loudly and publicly, to campaign and work for change.  No one individual has the right to deprive another of that privilege. 

I am no big fan of our current president, never have been. However, in recent days, we've had the completely idiotic condemnation of O'bama because he used the offensive "N" word. It's not that the word isn't offensive, it's ugly.  But, there's not one person who berated the president that is not intelligent enough to know the context that he used the word in.  We have become a nation of politically correct pea-brains, purposefully misreading, spinning and twisting actions and words. Words, folks...you CAN NOT censor and ban words. The freedom of speaking those words, however offensive to some, is one of our biggest privileges.

This ultra sensitive, narcissistic culture that we have nurtured isn't correcting injustices, it's fanning the flames of hate.  The PC Nazis are stomping and prancing and attempting to turn offensive and ugly behavior into a crime, trying to ban any words or actions that they don't like or agree with. I say, mind your own business, take care of your own self.  In your self important arrogance, don't show me the nightmarish deaths and horrors of smokers and abused animals. Your latest genius terrorist strategy, being sure that I know the horrible death I will face if I drink soda pop. Get off of my TV! Get out of my life! 

When I said "bolder" this is what I mean.  It's no longer enough to give warnings or information, they must force feed us their opinions.  Who are They?  America is supposed to be about WE.  A nation that is free for all recognizes that many compromises will be necessary.  You can stand up all day long and tell me that you think I'm stupid or wrong, but never try to take away my right to be stupid or wrong.

Please, Spare Me the Gory Details

Why is it these days, there is a compulsion to know, see and hear EV-E-RY thing?  Actually, I'm not sure that so many are compelled to this, but multitudes are compelled to show and tell us.  I can't speak, of course, for all. Myself, by the time I hear or read the headlines, the news (supposedly), I'm just sick and tired. 

Billy Graham said, "Self-centered indulgence, pride and a lack of shame for sin is the new emblem of American society." It rings painfully true.  I would have to be honest and say that I make very few decisions or judgments in my life based on religion. Indeed, I'm not a deeply spiritual individual. However, facts are facts. The majority of us, me most certainly, have people we love, family and friends and people we know that have personal problems and troubles.  The young folks of today have particularly hard and confusing decisions and choices.  I doubt, other than a few close friends, that anyone gives a rat's ass about those things.  Why would the fact that thousands of people know your name, make this more interesting?

Even the latest fashion trend is celebrities spending obscene amount of dollars on dresses that you can see their underwear through.  Why? I wish that I got that, but I just don't.  The "NEWS" is about people's ever changing or possibly illegal sexual preferences, their gender switching, their new aversion to their partner...a huge disgusting buffet of private crappiness. Everyday, I scour the news looking for some stories that are interesting, not about famous names, have some type of value.  It's not that people don't have true dilemmas or that I don't think they have the right to be, and to a degree, do what they want. Please, spare me the endless details. 

I get that people sometimes need validation, approval. Whatever happened to the notion of privacy, to pride and dignity?  Keeping private things private, doesn't mean that you're ashamed, it simply means that you have some self respect and dignity and that it's nobody's damn business.  I truly am so weary and sickened by the current obsession to dig around in one's life closet, drag out the stinkiest, nastiest & ugliest bag of secrets that is there and splash it across any media that will promote it. I may be a bitchy old broad, but it seems much less about difficult events in one's life and much more about publicity. Folks that have no personal boundaries or self respect don't seem to mind a bit what kind of publicity they get. A world filled with narcissistic inhabitants will not be a place any humans will thrive in.